You Are My Sunshine, My Only Sunshine

     Perseverance has always been a part of my life, I’ve just never used that word to describe what I do as a part of me [until now].  I’ve always been involved in activities, I’ve always kept pushing forward, and I never regret any decision that I’ve made.  I’m not one to give up because I’ve never seen that as an option.  I admit that I have fallen down many times and wanted to give up, but I never did truly give up.  Sometimes, you learn best at those junctures in life.  This trip has included perseverance in many different ways.  First of all, the courses I have been taking here with Dr. Keith have really taught me a lot about viewing music therapy through different lenses and for pushing my own views of music therapy.  The students on this trip represent 5 different universities, none with the exact same values.  Class discussions have been, at times, really mentally exhausting.  We all have to try and find a balance that works with all of our opinions.  In doing so, I challenge my own opinions and open them up to more and more possibilities every day.  This final week of classes did just that.  Our assignment for this week was to write a response paper on an article posted to the Voices page.  I chose to research community music therapy since I’ve only come across the term in my studies.  I didn’t learn much out of the article itself besides research summations.  What I wanted more was the practice behind it.  I wanted to hear the music techniques used and how the therapist interacted with the community to build community bonds or how the therapist helped guide the individual to become part of the community or how members of communities interacted.  I was presented with even more questions.  Being a detail oriented person, I want to know more.  So I found the World Congress program and circled the sessions that had community music therapy in the title or something related to the nature of social work.  I am always determined to learn more.  That’s what I love about music therapy – you are always learning: about how to improve your counseling techniques, your music techniques, your music therapy techniques, etc.

     Being abroad teaches you a lot about yourself.  It tests your levels of patience, it opens your mind to other ways of thinking and even noticing similarities, and it allows you to gain an independence.  Even being with others, you learn to go at your own pace.  I really put other people before myself, but I’m finding that that has a limit.  When being in a new country, you do what makes you happy [at your own pace].  A group of us took a 50 km bike excursion this weekend and I was in quite a bit of pain from the bike ride itself.  The bumps in the road were giving me a migraine like the ones I used to get before I had neurosurgery.  But I wanted to be able to experience all of these adventures, so I walked slowly and took in all the beauty that was around me.  The fields we biked through still amaze me – the beauty that just surrounds you is impeccable.  I just closed my eyes and listened to the wind blowing through the wheat.  Then the hike a few days after really hit my legs, but I didn’t want to stop.  The views that I saw on the way were profound.  We stopped at an old Nazi propaganda amphitheater and an old, ruined monastery.  If you clear your mind enough, you can just imagine what it looked like when it was first built, filled with people for very different reasons.  These experiences don’t come much in the United States because it’s history doesn’t date back as far.  That was worth every step of the way, but more importantly the conversations you have with the people on the way there and back are worth so much.  These stories we all have to tell are really special.  You see the joy and concern in every conversation you have.  I feel like I’ve known a lot of people for a while now, but it’s only been 3 weeks.  And then with 2 people from my school, I feel like I’ve really gotten to know better, which is a really great thing to be able to take back for my senior year of college.  Stories are what make a life – experiences are everything.  So, that is my brief summation of my 3 week adventure in Heidelberg.  My hope for the future: to continue to find joy in every day.

The Third Step to Becoming German: Forget Convenience

Little things like having to pack my own grocery bags, lack of AC, and heavy use of stairs have led me to wonder why Europeans in general don't seem to invest much in convenience. They mostly opt for walking or riding a bike in the city. The grocery stores are microscopic and you have to, as previously stated, pack your own bags even if you are towing along four children. Our most recent apartment was up seven flights of stairs. Of course, all of these things could be a result of lack of space in the city, old buildings, etc. In fact, that is probably exactly what it is. I have noticed, however, that these things have somehow managed to contribute to a greater quality of life. Wouldn't it make more sense though that having an easier life would make for a happier one? Wouldn't it make sense that getting everything done in the most time-efficient way possible would allow for time spent doing more recreational things? My theory is that we spend so much time focusing on being efficient, on getting things done, that before we know it the sun has set and it's time for bed. We live for the weekends in our society, but is that really how we are meant to live? I don't believe so. The Europeans know how to take time to do everything. It may not be the most convenient or the most efficient, but I think it must be more rewarding. For example, meals here are a long, drawn out affair. This has been difficult for me to adjust to. Who has time for three hour meals, really? I am learning to just stop worrying and go with it. I have believed for a long time that convenience and striving for convenience, for time effficiency, sucks the life out of us. During the school year, I have so much to do I absolutely must pack in as much as I can into as little time as I can. I don't have time for multiple trips from my car, so I take everything at once. I don't have time to ride my bike to the grocery store, so I drive the 1.5 miles instead. I think when I get back, I would like to try to adopt the European way of taking time for things, however difficult that may be in our society of getting ahead. Afterall, isn't more important that we invest in people and a fulfilling life than temporary success? That is one reason why I am so excited about music therapy. Sessions aren't about packing as much  as you can into the session. You have a plan and if you can stick with it, great. If not, also great. The only thing that matters is what reaches the client and what helps them towards success. This is something I believe is worth investing my time in. Maybe it's not such a bad thing to forget convenience.

Miscellaneous life learning...

It’s crazy to think that only three short weeks ago we were just arriving in the beautiful town of Heidelberg, but that feels like a lifetime away.  This is probably because I was a different “Sarah” prior to this trip.  I believe that in such a short time I have already changed in many ways.  They say travel truly broadens your horizons, and so far it certainly has broadened mine.

            For one, it has been a very spiritual journey.  Never in my life have I been surrounded by so many people who share different beliefs than me. I could have let this scare me, but I have instead chosen to embrace it.  This whole experience has shown me firsthand how people of my religion, Christianity, truly do put themselves in a bubble often times.  Our eyes are closed to people who do not share our faith, and this often causes us to lose excellent opportunities to make amazing friends and make positive impacts.  Instead, we turn our backs in judgment, and this is very scary to me.  I’ve seen a different side of Christianity during this trip that I had never noticed before.  It’s the side that I sadly believe that the world often sees, and this makes me sick. Unfortunately, believers, still have quite a way to go to live the way Christ taught us to live. 

             Furthermore, a big thing I pray for is that Christians will be known for what we do rather than what we don’t do.  We get so caught up in “not doing this” and “not doing that” that we forget what we should do.  This gives christians a stigma of being hateful, which is the complete opposite of what we should be known for.  I hope that if I stand for Christ, what I stand against will be implied. 

             I know none of this has much to do with the travel I have been doing in Germany, but these are things that have been heavy on my heart the past couple of weeks.  I believe that if I had not gone on this trip, the realizations I have reached would not have come as easily.  I'm very thankful for it all, and I'm very excited for what is yet to come on the remainder of this amazing adventure!

            

             

F is For Friends Who Do Stuff Together!

As my last week in Heidelberg comes to an all too soon close, clinical placement week is looming just ahead. Throughout this week, all of the wonderful new friends I have made will be scattered in small groups across Central Europe, with myself and two others landing in Holland. I have to say, I feel very fortunate to get the opportunity to visit a third European country during my study abroad experience. Not many American college students can say they have stayed in the Netherlands!

While I am certain I will be very busy observing and soaking up as much as I possibly can during my placement, it will also be a bittersweet week. Not only will I be recovering from three unbelievable weeks in Heidelberg, but this will be the first time that I have been away from the incredible people I have met in my group since this whirlwind began. We have found ourselves musing aloud over how strange next week will be without each other, and it's true.

It's an unique phenomenon, how strangers with a common interest can wind up forming strong friendships in such a minuscule time frame. I never realized that entering a life changing experience such as studying abroad would introduce me to people that I would fall in love with by the end of the first day. There's really no describing the seamless way we have all fit together, each bringing our own unique personalities and gifts to the table, and experiencing a once in a lifetime trip together. I feel that I have gained lifelong peers, colleagues, and friends, and we are only half way through. This coming week really is going to be odd, but I'm thankful for that. A rich man (woman?) is one who has someone to miss. Here's to the fourth week of music therapy study abroad... in Holland!
   

Futbol World Cup

                 Last thursday evening in Heidelberg, I was fortunate enough to experience the World Cup game: USA vs. Germany. The week leading up to the game, one question stuck out in my mind: Who was I going to root for? While shopping the day before, I decided to buy a shirt displaying the Germany flag colors. The afternoon of the game arrived, and I got my American self all dressed up in my Germany gear. We walked to a popular courtyard in the University of Heidelberg architecture building, packed full with people of all ages to watch the game. We had a fun time eating, drinking, and watching the eventful game. There were a few people wearing American spirit wear, but we were mainly surrounded by a sea of red, yellow, and black. As we were walking back from the bratwurst stand, a group of people stopped us to chat with us. They asked us if we were from America; Clearly, the clothing we were sporting wasn’t fooling anyone! After we admitted that we were, they then asked who we were rooting for. I paused to think about it for a moment. It would be fun to root for the country I was currently in, and if they won, celebrate among the Germans. On the other hand, I am American and it would be really cool to be in another country, cheering for my homeland from far away. After this short internal monologue, I decided (1) I would be happy if either team won. It’s actually quite enjoyable to root for both teams at the same time, and to have a happy ending, no matter the outcome; and (2) in the past 3 weeks, Heidelberg has become my home away from home. I feel comfortable taking my usual route to and from class on my bicycle, returning back to my apartment, and deciding how the evening will pan out. I feel safe exploring the city and its hidden delights, and knowing I have a place to rest my head every night. I have been making wonderful memories in good company, with friends that will last a lifetime. At the end of the day, Germany won, USA was still in it, and I don’t think I will every forget that exciting day. 

The Beauty that Surrounds Me

My third excellent week in Germany has passed! I am very sad to be leaving Heidelberg, but I am also very excited to begin my stay in the Netherlands and to hopefully observe some music therapy.  
Every day, I become more and more astonished with the incredible kindness of the people I have come across here in Heidelberg. All of the music therapy students have been so welcoming and have made an effort to spend time with us and talk to us. I have enjoyed learning about their lifestyle and about their approaches to music therapy very much. 
Still after my third week, I have not gotten use to the beauty that surrounds me. Yesterday, a few of us from the group biked to Speyer and I had another chance to take it all in. As soon as you ride out of Heidelberg, you are suddenly riding through miles and miles of farmland and it is lovely. I am an advocate of small-scale farming and it appears as though there is more of that here in Germany than in the US. 
This week I got to visit a market near my apartment and the outdoor venue was filled with booths that had the most beautiful flowers and freshest vegetables, fruits, and baked goods. One evening our group had a picnic by the river with some of the German students. We played music, shared food, and enjoyed the atmosphere.Thursday night, many of us went to an outdoor venue where tons of people congregated to drink beer, eat sausages, and watch the World Cup-Germany vs. USA game. It was so much fun and although I was criticized by friends at home on Facebook for painting a German flag on my face, I do not take it back!! I love my country and am proud of where I am from, but that night, I supported Germany because this country has been so welcoming to me these past three weeks and I owe it some appreciation
I am going to miss The Old Town, the river, riding my bike all over, the German students, and our adorable and tiny neighborhood grocery store. But alas, new adventures are awaiting!

Week 3: Adventure is out there

This week was definitely the week of adventure.

In class we continued to try and categorize as well as define what we did as music therapists. This question is some thing that we face on a daily basis, whether we are pondering it or others are inquiring: What is a music therapist? What is music therapy. We decided to create a concept map, but even then, does a concept map really dictate what we do? All of these questions have led me to have different ideas to add to my own philosophies of music therapy. I realized that I'm really not a behavioral therapist, but I'm also not exactly a mold of other types of music therapy perspectives. My ideas and thoughts are still developing as I proceed with my career, which I think is how it should be at this juncture.

We also went on two adventures this week. Jacky and I went with one of the Heidelberg students, Sven, to go swimming in a part of the Neckar. This was honestly one of my most favorite experiences I've had thus far. I got to swim in a river, which is one of my absolute favorite things to do, and explore nature. This put me right in my element and I was so happy to have gotten the chance to experience this part of Heidelberg. Yesterday, we took a 50 kilometer bike ride to Speyer and Schwetzingen. In Speyer, we saw a gorgeous cathedral and amazing pieces of Jewish history in Germany. In Schwetzingen, we saw the gardens of a marvelous palace. We were surrounded by beauty during the whole trip, whether when it was when we hit a destination or when we rode through field of wheat, it was simply stunning.

As this week closes we are still having a few more adventures with the people of Heidelberg. The students have been unbelievably helpful and welcoming. They have given us many memorable adventures. From open mic night to long afternoons on the Neckar, the students have been so supportive. We are going on a hike to the top of one of the larger hills of Heidelberg with some of the students tomorrow. While this adventure here is ending, it is important to remember how many great times that we had here. I will be definitely trying everything I can to come back here in the next few years so I can enjoy and be a part of this wonderful city again. Now, on to Holland for the next week!

Cinderella’s shoe...

As we approach our last day in Heidelberg, many questions passed my mind.

knowing that I will be leaving  a city that captured my heart , and I will be living a solo experience next  week in Essen, after getting used to sing the song of life with a chorus of my fellow music therapy students with whom I shared laughter, curiosity, adventures, stories and interests during our stay Germany…

this process makes me always wonder, what is the lesson beyond farewells?
Why are we destined to go through this vicious circle in our lives…Curiosity, motivation, experience, attachment and love, But just at the moment when we begin to have a habit…

Just in that moment when we overcome our challenges, accept our differences, get into the rhythm of where we are, what we do, with whom we live… The clock tic, Toc, and life says: ‘’it is time to leave Cinderella… it’s time to leave!’’

But  remains the question…WHY ?? I don’t assume by any means that I have an answer for it , I am just speaking out loud  my heart’s voice  !

Why do life give us repeatedly this kind of experiences?  Why do life help us create bonds then shares to break them !!
And it tend to do that repeatedly.. so it is not a single event !

May be there is a lesson, beyond that ! Life keeps texting this message. Until we get it right , which may seem to be  confusing ! Because, it invites you to bond and  engage with new experiences, places and persons and then contemplate for you to be detached from all of that !… So… what’s really the message….Bond or dis-bond!!??
Weird! However, may be the message of life to us lies in the combination of both….so it is more a cycle and a process than a phase ….It is more Terminate to engage and engage to terminate…
It’s hard to take a part from the other… Life & Death a twin regardless their differences…you must deal with both of them ... This could be reflected in our relation-ship with our  clients and how we tend to end the sessions of therapy with them.

 Better to take the concept of termination in our practice to a cycle more than a phase….Termination, with our clients should hold both messages….Bond to dis-bond… and dis- bond to bond and so on.

It reminds me of this old game when you sit in a circle and start to whisper a short message to the ears of your neighbour and wait for the same message to get back to you , holding a lot of variation  acquired along the circle from every player.

Hence , termination, should always be a message of hope, and trust  that whenever we dis-bond we do that to bond again and gain new experiences, a message of trust that somehow the circle will join again, holding tones of memories , laughters and variations..

Though, I still want to lose my shoe in Heidelberg… and that the city will find me again somehow…someday…
Mina.

 

 

A Passage Back in Time: Week 2

I apologize for the lateness of this post, but better late than never!

With the completion of our second week of study and exploration, many more incredible memories and experiences were had and shared.  In particular, we capped off our eventful week with a 3-day, 2-night stay in the city of Leipzig, the birthplace and home for many of the great musicians and composers. 

This past week was incredibly special because it was the conclusion of “Bachfest,” a celebration of all things musical relating to Johann Sebastian Bach, as well as the works of many other legendary composers of the Baroque era.  The central area of the city was alive with the passion for the virtuoso composer, with multiple churches and other locations serving as venues to play his and his contemporaries’ works.  On Friday evening in a concert and on Sunday morning during a service, I was able to experience the marvel that was J. S. Bach’s artistic genius.  Both of my experiences took place in St. Thomas Church, where Bach was the cantor from 1723 until his death in 1750.  The organ be used bore the crest of Bach (his initials superimposed onto a mirror image of itself), and was recently renovated with specifications to create the most tonally authentic recreation of what Bach had used.  Also in the church were the remains of J. S. Bach himself, which added to the energy of the performance of his works.  If you closed your eyes and allowed Bach’s tantalizingly rich and complex melodies to wrap around you ears, mind, and then consciousness, you feel as if, while standing in the historic church listening to the true musical essence of an era of our human history, you were there, beside Bach and his masterful artistic expression, and all those other souls of the day that were transported to a better place riding on the touch of one man’s fingers.  I can say it was truly a divine experience to be able to listen to Bach in such a natural form, and the energy from my experience will surely resonate with me for quite some time, just like those souls of the day. 

Every Flower is a Soul Blossoming in Nature- (Gerard De Nerval)

I noticed these European cities are home to some of the most vivid flowers. You can tell that those who have planted them have really taken the time to nourish, water, and love them. The bright colored flowers shining in the sun, plus a glass wine is a recipe for a wonderful day! This country is so inspiring.  

              German music therapists have some different concepts and theories. I’ve really enjoyed learning about Psychosomatics, Monitor-therapy, and variations of musical improvisation. Some of our classes were student taught, and thank goodness they are all in English! It’s been so much fun getting to work and socialize with the master’s music therapy students here at SRH. Sometimes I get nervous around them, but I’ve kept in mind that they’re probably just as nervous as I am!

Through classes I’ve learned that even improvisation can have structure. Some of the German taught classes have stressed the importance of talk/clean communication with clients. I’ve learned that through important aspects of our career; music, therapist and client, that we have to learn to balance all three (easier said than done). We’ve gotten to learn how sound transfers to our ear, when infants are affected by musical behaviors and overall why humans behave to music the way they do. It’s all individual, every perspective is different per sound, song. We create different feelings, visuals, and memories, and yet something that makes us feel so different still unites us all. It purely amazing to me!

              The most challenging party of the week, physically, was climbing up a steep mountain while eating ice-cream! A small groups of us hiked to a Nazi built amphitheater, which is now used for anti-nazi gatherings. For some odd reason, it ended up being of the most peaceful spots I’ve been to in my lifetime. The amphitheater makes you feel so, SO small and makes you reflect on life no matter where you’re at on your journey. I would definitely recommend the hike for those who plan to come to Heidelberg or love to take selfies!

              Another great week spent and I can see that some of the relationships I’m making with other students will carry on for a long time! Each day our reliability expands and we grow closer and stronger! I will miss these kids from all over North America when I have to go home.

 

The Rhythm of Life

It's hard to believe another week has passed in my abroad adventures. Throughout my time, I have enjoyed biking, exploring, and eating my way through Germany! At the end of this week, we will be taking off from our apartments in Heidelberg and venturing our separate ways to clinical sites (only for a week, thank goodness, I'm not ready to say goodbye to everyone yet!) I have enjoyed biking to our classes at SRH Hochschule Heidelberg, and learning in the incredible music therapy facility they have. One topic that was of particular interest to me this week in our Psychology of Music class is the Acquisition of Music. Ever since I took a Music & Development course at my university, I have been fascinated by the concept of music prenatally and during infancy. While in utero, the fetus is soothed and oriented by the rhythmic sounds of its mother's heartbeat and voice. These prenatal auditory experiences provide enriching sound environments, stimulating nerve cell, auditory structure, and CNS growth. After birth, infants have specific predispositions to music, including pitch and rhythm discrimination, and preference for it's mother's voice. Even before birth, music is a part of life. We are exposed to the sounds of the world around us, impacting our lives greatly everyday. Without prenatal auditory stimulation, the fetus risks reduced localization and discrimination skills. Infant-directed speech/singing is a useful tool that can facilitate secure attachment, modify an infant's state of being, and can provide information for auditory pattern structure. At a crucial point of growth, it is important that a baby is experiencing sensory stimulation, ensuring neuronal structure and development. Throughout a person's life, music has influence: physiologically, emotionally, psychologically. From the top 40 hit you jam out to with friends or the simple rhythms of a beating heart, music can imprint a person forever.

From Start to Life

Last week marked the 7^th year that my dad had passed away.  He and I shared this love for music.  I have 2 distinct instances that I can remember vividly.  One year on Valentine’s Day, he took me to a Josh Groban concert in Cleveland and that continues to be one of my favorite memories.  We were sitting in the nosebleed section around a whole bunch of lovely dovey couples, but it was like we were the only 2 in that venue.  The other occasion was during solo and ensemble contest when I was an 8^th grader.  I had just finished playing Canon in D (memorized) on a grand stage with a beautiful Steinway concert grand piano.  As I was walking off stage, I looked for my parents and was greeted with the biggest smile I have ever seen worn on my dad’s face.  You would have thought I won the Pulitzer Prize.  After I lost him, I turned to the piano to seek guidance and strength.  When I was in high school looking for future careers, I aspired to be a lawyer just like him…but then I found music therapy.  So one of the inspirations behind my studying music therapy was and is to provide people with the sense of comfort that music provided for me.  His life was also about adventure.  So I am still amazed every day at this adventure of studying music therapy in Germany.  I have so many new questions, so many new insights.  Music therapy in Germany focuses, from what I can tell, on the psychosomatic populations.  And watching the students’ classes, I’m questioning how they prepare to be these incredible improvisers.  And then from there, how do they form goals for their clients, how do they mark success?  I’ve listened to many of us commenting on how incredible German culture is.  Many things seem to be very progressive, but they only have one university that offers a bachelor’s degree in music therapy.  It’s incredible to see growth of knowledge in just a few weeks. 

This week’s journey ended with a beautiful note.  The piano is where this whole journey began and where it continues to guide me.  I was honored to be able to play the piano in the Schumann house in Leipzig.  The very one they would have played on.  That was just…surreal.  That was closing the Leipzig adventure with a sense of comfort.  I walked along the corridor and listened peacefully as an elderly gentleman played Schumann on that very piano.  So the essence of music therapy is more than just a definition.  It’s a way of living.  The stories of life continue on long after the last breath.  Music carries their voices, their emotions, their intent through the listeners, the performers.  And what an incredible thing to be able to form and mold that to fit our voices, our emotions, our very being.  I hope on day someone sees all of the beauty of an experience, a journey.  Because you will never quite be the same after that.